Things That Money Can't Buy
When I was young (younger, that is - I'm 29), I used to overestimate the value of money. I wouldn't say it outright. I wouldn't tell people, "Money is everything." No, not like that.
But deep within, I would somehow feel that a lot of money would make me continuously and persistently happy. My everyday sense of 'unease' and 'anxiety' would vanish.
Now, I know better.
First, I know that money has very little to do with happiness beyond fulfilling survival needs. Yes, it can help you live more comfortably but the question is: are you aware and conscious enough at that moment to enjoy that comfort?
For example, you may travel to a place by bus. Or your may travel by cab. The cab will be more expensive. Yes, travelling in the cab is probably more comfortable (especially if the bus is crowded) - but are you aware and conscious enough to enjoy being in the cab? Or is your mind drifting to -thoughts of 'what does he/she think of me', 'I shouldn't have done that', 'I am worried about that future situation' - while you are in the cab? If you are aware enough to enjoy the experience, even the bus journey will become interesting and come alive - so in that case the different between the two experiences isn't much.
Similarly, money cannot relieve that sense of unease or meaninglessness or anxiety that most of us feel almost continuously - to such an extent that we don't even notice it. When visiting an exceptionally beautiful hill station - for a few seconds - you may have felt more alive or joyous. That daily unease and worry may have dropped away. But - it will soon return even in the hill station in a few hours. That unease (this is my theory based on some reading and some experience) - is because of fear and uncertainty about who you are - and whether everything will work out as you want it to work out - thus preserving your identity and strengthening it. True meditation can help you watch this feeling in yourself and dissolve it - but money can't buy it.
So, money can't buy you peace of mind - but it can buy you books and special retreats. Yet, again - it is your awareness and consciousness and alertness while you read that book or participate in that retreat that will determine what you take out of it.
I am not saying money is useless, of course. But the difference between the younger me and the now me here is that the younger me thought having money would automatically make me feel happy and fulfilled. The now me knows that internally - not much will change no matter how much money I have.
If I suddenly have an extra Rs 10,000,000 tomorrow, the truth is - and I know this sounds ridiculous but a part of me knows it to be true - not much will change inside me.
Of course, a lot will change outside me. And what changes outside me will impact what changes inside me. But that is over a very short period of time - say a month - while my mind is getting its kicks and getting excited by a sudden 'burst' in identity. But soon enough, probably in six months or in a year, the external changes will not be changes anymore. I'll get used to more comfort - that's it. My internal dilemmas and challenges won't suddenly go away. If I have deep pain and longing within me - the pain and longing will still be there. If I have a feeling of 'I am not good enough' or 'do others perceive me as being good enough?' that feeling will STILL be there despite the money. And if I have a sense of meaninglessness about my day, that meaninglessness will not suddenly change until an internal shift happens WITHIN me - and that shift is not money-dependent.
No matter how rich a person is, when they wake up, they go through the same dilemmas and fears and worries and pain that any other person goes through. Our mind says, "If you are rich, your unease and all your problems will go away." It's lying. It doesn't know. There is probably nothing in the external world around us that will make all worries and problems go away.
The shift just has to be internal.
But deep within, I would somehow feel that a lot of money would make me continuously and persistently happy. My everyday sense of 'unease' and 'anxiety' would vanish.
Now, I know better.
First, I know that money has very little to do with happiness beyond fulfilling survival needs. Yes, it can help you live more comfortably but the question is: are you aware and conscious enough at that moment to enjoy that comfort?
For example, you may travel to a place by bus. Or your may travel by cab. The cab will be more expensive. Yes, travelling in the cab is probably more comfortable (especially if the bus is crowded) - but are you aware and conscious enough to enjoy being in the cab? Or is your mind drifting to -thoughts of 'what does he/she think of me', 'I shouldn't have done that', 'I am worried about that future situation' - while you are in the cab? If you are aware enough to enjoy the experience, even the bus journey will become interesting and come alive - so in that case the different between the two experiences isn't much.
Similarly, money cannot relieve that sense of unease or meaninglessness or anxiety that most of us feel almost continuously - to such an extent that we don't even notice it. When visiting an exceptionally beautiful hill station - for a few seconds - you may have felt more alive or joyous. That daily unease and worry may have dropped away. But - it will soon return even in the hill station in a few hours. That unease (this is my theory based on some reading and some experience) - is because of fear and uncertainty about who you are - and whether everything will work out as you want it to work out - thus preserving your identity and strengthening it. True meditation can help you watch this feeling in yourself and dissolve it - but money can't buy it.
So, money can't buy you peace of mind - but it can buy you books and special retreats. Yet, again - it is your awareness and consciousness and alertness while you read that book or participate in that retreat that will determine what you take out of it.
I am not saying money is useless, of course. But the difference between the younger me and the now me here is that the younger me thought having money would automatically make me feel happy and fulfilled. The now me knows that internally - not much will change no matter how much money I have.
If I suddenly have an extra Rs 10,000,000 tomorrow, the truth is - and I know this sounds ridiculous but a part of me knows it to be true - not much will change inside me.
Of course, a lot will change outside me. And what changes outside me will impact what changes inside me. But that is over a very short period of time - say a month - while my mind is getting its kicks and getting excited by a sudden 'burst' in identity. But soon enough, probably in six months or in a year, the external changes will not be changes anymore. I'll get used to more comfort - that's it. My internal dilemmas and challenges won't suddenly go away. If I have deep pain and longing within me - the pain and longing will still be there. If I have a feeling of 'I am not good enough' or 'do others perceive me as being good enough?' that feeling will STILL be there despite the money. And if I have a sense of meaninglessness about my day, that meaninglessness will not suddenly change until an internal shift happens WITHIN me - and that shift is not money-dependent.
No matter how rich a person is, when they wake up, they go through the same dilemmas and fears and worries and pain that any other person goes through. Our mind says, "If you are rich, your unease and all your problems will go away." It's lying. It doesn't know. There is probably nothing in the external world around us that will make all worries and problems go away.
The shift just has to be internal.
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